Previously we discussed how I had to go to a party and to make it perfect how I planned everything I was going to do at the party. Why did I need to plan it? You can find out here.
On the big party day when I came home from the night shift at around 10 am, summary of my plan was to get some sleep first (night shifts are very tiring), wake up at approximately 3 in the afternoon, go shopping for the blazer with my girlfriend Maahi [not her real name] and leave for the party at 5 O’ clock at max to get there at 6 which was the time on the invitation card. So I called her to give her the heads up about it.
Now, she had her own issues. She told me that she had to go to the office at least for half an hour just to mark attendance. It was fine with me because the shopping mall was not more than 2 minutes from the office and if she had to go to the office, I can wake up a little early at around 2 pm and we could leave home at around 2:30 as office was 30 minutes from home via an auto-rickshaw. Then she told me that she didn’t want to cook lunch so we should eat at office only. Now this was a problem because office lunch timings were only till 2 o’clock so we had to get there at least at 1:30 to have Butter Chicken with actual chicken pieces in it. When I did the math, I got to know that I had to wake up at 1 in the afternoon and would only be getting exactly 3 hours of sleep.
Now the problem here is that naps are not my thing even if it is for 2-3 hours. No alarms, phone calls or door-bells work on me when I am asleep and no pouring water either if you are not ready to get punched in the face. I was sure that if I sleep now I won’t be able to wake up on time. So I decided not to sleep at all. It seemed like a good decision at the moment because if I didn’t sleep I could have a nice breakfast, a bath which I was missing since last seven days, to practice some dance steps that I was going to perform at the party and also I could leave at around 12 o’clock, have a good and relaxed lunch, I could go shopping and buy everything necessary [a blazer] for the party then I could get ready on time and everything would work out perfect. Thinking all that, happy in my mind, I started cooking breakfast.
At around 12:30 pm I was ready to leave for office, Maahi called and told me that her roommate Shreya was also coming to the shopping thing with us. I have seen her once or twice but we didn’t talk much. Why? Remember the thing that I told you about me not being able to talk to strangers, that’s why. I knew that I won’t have much fun while shopping. Yes, I know it is kind of embarrassing for males have fun while shopping but I really do, especially if it’s my things we are shopping for. I would like to try everything out and take my time, more so while buying something expensive, for example: – A blazer. So I didn’t like the idea of her being there when we are shopping as I would have to hurry up about my shopping and I was guessing that she was going to the mall with the same purpose as mine, that is to shop, and she would waste my time too in the process. Also this shopping was supposed to be something that only Maahi and I should be doing together and Shreya would be nothing but “kabab me haddi” for that matter.
I couldn’t directly ask Maahi to get rid of Shreya as I didn’t want to seem like a total jerk, so I started looking for excuses so that we can get rid of the roommate. How do I do that? I figured that the best way would be to start a fight. That way, Shreya definitely goes out of the picture. I know that I was being little too extreme but I thought Maahi will understand what I am trying to do and she would make some excuse to her. While I achieved the ultimate goal of getting rid of Shreya by doing this, it took a lot of time and energy to make-up with Maahi again. Why I am mentioning energy? Because whenever we fight, it’s like a tradition to have sex when finally making up. So it was already 3:30 when things went back to normal again.
In the fighting, she had revealed that she had to leave the final auditions for the company’s cultural fest just to spend time with me so after we had resolved things between us I thought it was my duty to convince her to participate in the auditions. The auditions were to finish at 5 pm and we were still at my apartment at around 4:00 pm. We left to office as soon as possible but by the time we got(4:30 PM), the auditions had already finished and the names of the people who made to the final list were being announced. I felt guilty as it was because of me that she couldn’t participate in the auditions but I was also happy at the same time as now we could go shopping for my blazer which was an essential part of the plan but just then some of her friends told her to go talk to the selectors to give her a chance to perform. As she knew that we might get late for the shopping if she is to go to the auditions, she looked at me with questions in her eyes and suddenly love took over my mind. At that time her happiness mattered more to me than anything else and I nodded.
My first thought was to go to the person in-charge for trials and talk to him myself about giving Maahi a chance but it was just for a moment until I realised that he too is a stranger and I don’t talk to strangers until they first talk to me. So instead of talking to him myself, I asked her to talk to him. She did and not to my surprise she along with two other girls got the chance to perform.
The song was “Angraji beat” (YouTube link to the song) and she performed “Kathak” ( wikipedia link) and she was so good at it that everybody was looking at her only. I was proud of her and felt an astronomical surge of love up to a point where I would have become oblivious to the people around me and hugged her in front of the whole office (It’s a big deal, especially for me) if I was not so self-conscious. There was not one doubt in my mind that she will make it to the finals.
It was 5 o’clock by the time her audition was over. According to my plan, I was supposed to leave for the party at 5 so I told her that we should forget about the blazer and head home but she insisted that we should buy a blazer as she wanted me to look super sexy at the party (her words, not mine), I still don’t know why she wanted that as she won’t be at the party and all the other girls would be. I too wanted to wear the blazer so I anyway agreed with one condition that we must not waste any time, not even a second now.
She was ok with it but as soon as we got out of the office she said,” I am thirsty”. I hurriedly replied,” We will buy something on the way to the mall”. I thought she could handle it for a few minutes but then she made a kitten face, with big round eyes. If I say no now, I would immediately termed as cruel and selfish. I had to go back to cafeteria with her. Whole this time, I swear to god, I wanted to bash her head open. But it would be impossible for me to escape after killing her as there were a lot of people around. I could never have gotten away with it. With all that said, I want you all to know that I truly loved her. But you have to understand here that I was literally trying to save every second that I could.
Anyway we had to go back to the office and waste 4 minutes 30 seconds because of her. When we came out of the office again, the toil to save that time by taking an auto-rickshaw was also in vain as no rickshaw driver agreed to go to the mall. So left out of options we started walking to the mall. I have taken that walk a number of times but at that time only I realised that it’s not as near as I used to think. It took us whole ten minutes to get to the mall. I couldn’t even run to the mall as she was tired from all the dancing.
Once we got in the mall, the shopper’s stop was just to the right of entrance. It made me smile when I thought I didn’t had to walk around the mall too much and have saved a few minutes in the process. As soon as we got to the men’s section on the first floor I desperately started looking for the blazers but couldn’t find it until I circled around the whole floor. I wanted to kill myself when I found that blazers were just left to the place from where I started looking.
Finally, when I got to look through blazers, I found that none of the blazers had the spirit I needed for the party, every blazer that we were shown was a part of the formal attire, supposed to be worn at office meetings, and also they all had these “shoulder pads” things which made them look like the blazer of “Rajesh band” specialised in baaraats. When I talked to the salesman about it, he told me to look for “Zero Gravity blazer” which is not supposed to have these shoulder pads.
I was thinking to myself, “What kind of stupid name is zero gravity blazer?” It, in no way, meant that these blazers would not have shoulder pads. I mean, why not just say “blazers without shoulder pads”, it’s easy to understand and not hard to say either. Anyways, these “zero gravity blazers” were only be available in specific showrooms. So even after going through all the stuff in there and investing precious 10 minutes, I had to go look for my blazer in individual showrooms.
Now my thoughts were to buy the first blazer that didn’t had shoulder pads but I could not find a single blazer in the whole, big enough to fit a whole city in it, fukcing mall (Pardon my language, but I was really frustrated). It was 5:30 already and I still couldn’t find anything so I had to go home without the blazer. The blazer was just an extra advantage but I could yet do well.
The plan was still perfect, I just never got the chance to execute it. The reason? A tiny detail that i will tell you next time.
and remember, there are still a lot of but’s left. 🙂
To be continued…